How to get around party sects? Any advice?

I'm running into a bit of a wall after joining my local socialist org. Right now It's feeling like "Philosophers have only interpreted the world, the point, however, is to argue endlessly about minutiae, seek purity, and take no meaningful action."

I started by picking a group consistent with my beliefs at the time, but as I've read more and improved my political education (which has been one of the better things about the group) my political beliefs have naturally evolved, to the point where they are incompatible with some of the group taboos.

Right now I'm self-censoring to an extent. I like working with and trust many of my comrades, but I can't bite my tongue forever. What got me finally engaged in socialist organizing and out of the soc dem world was wanting to build from a base I found morally consistent, but now I'm questioning if that tendency can lead to an infinite sequence of group hopping and disillusionment.

One impulse I have is to join a group with which I have more consistent beliefs, but I recognize that I am a moving target and that I'll likely not have perfect alignment with any party platform. Worse, it seems in my city the groups won't collaborate due to perceived slights, bad takes, or even 'this is a small city' personal issues. I suspect this is a similar story in many cities.

We're told we can't work with the other group because they're too impatient or not patient enough, too tactical or too idealist, too cliquey or too open, too 'Stalinist' or too 'Ultra-left'. Collaborations with potential comrades who believe deeply in revolution and share your views are non-starters because they violate taboos of the sect. (Taboos made well before I was conceived, and I'm older than most!) And of course, you must understand the way things transpired sometime in the 19th and 20th century and have great animosity for false interpretation or you're being ahistorical.

I would willingly work with anti-capitalist leftists of wide affiliation. Yet, I also recognize that loose coalitions around single-issue focuses and flash-in-the-pan moments will lead to dead ends without a political thrust and momentum.

All of this leads to inaction, dispersion of resources, and dithering. It is a huge distraction. Not to mention, potential comrades are turned away after witch-finding interviews, for underdeveloped or 'incompatible' political opinions. Within the group, it encourages a lack of critical thinking and open discussion, as a room of diverse, passionate thinkers shut their mouths rather than speak on issues where there is potential misalignment with party ideology.

For those of you who have been in the struggle for a long-time, what advice do you have? Where can my thinking be sharpened? Who has written about this well? Are there better ways or is this a rule of the game we have to accept?